Healing the Past: Understanding Our Relationship with Our Parents

On the journey toward personal well-being, there are times when life invites us—sometimes subtly, sometimes forcefully—to look back. Not to stay there, but to understand where we came from and what traces continue to mark our present.

One of the most revealing paths in this process is exploring our relationship with our parents. That bond, full of nuances and contradictions, is the first mirror through which we learned what it meant to love, to be loved, to belong… and also, often, what it meant to feel hurt, rejected, or insufficient.

Healing the past doesn't mean reliving it. It means looking at it with fresh eyes, with the maturity that time brings and the compassion that comes from self-knowledge. Understanding how that history shaped us—and how we can free ourselves from what no longer belongs to us—is one of the most profound steps toward inner peace.

The Original Mirror: How Our Relationship with Our Parents Defines Our Self-Love

From childhood, our parents are our role models and our first definition of love. Their way of speaking to us, looking at us, and accompanying us becomes the foundation upon which we build our identity and our sense of worthiness. But growing up also involves recognizing that they, like us, were once children. That they carried their own wounds, fears, and shortcomings.

When we don't acknowledge that history, we tend to repeat it. The same dynamics we experienced in childhood can reappear in our adult relationships: the need for approval, the fear of abandonment, difficulty setting boundaries, or the feeling of never being enough.

Looking at that relationship isn't an act of judgment, but of understanding. It's not about "blaming the parents," but rather understanding how their way of loving—even with their mistakes—shaped our own.

Healing is not forgetting: it is integrating

Closing the cycle with our parents isn't about forgetting what hurt, nor justifying what was wrong. It's about accepting that this is also part of our history. Healing the past means consciously integrating what we experienced: letting go of resistance, letting go of resentment, understanding that we can't change what happened, but we can change how we relate to it.

This integration is liberating. It allows us to see our parents not just as authority figures, but as imperfect human beings who did what they could with what they had. And from that understanding, we can be grateful for what they did give us and take what we need to continue growing.

The wounds we carry without realizing it

Many women, especially those in their 40s and 50s, reach this point in life feeling a mix of tiredness and disconnection. They've been daughters, mothers, professionals, caregivers, wives... but suddenly something changes. They begin to wonder:

“And now who am I, beyond all those roles?” “Why do I feel so empty if I’ve done everything right?”

At this stage, unresolved wounds from our parents often surface forcefully. They appear in the form of frustration, guilt, or impatience. In our relationships with our children, in our relationships, at work. And often, without realizing it, we repeat what we once promised not to repeat.

Healing that root is not a quick or superficial task. It requires courage, pause, and a loving look inward. But it also offers something immensely liberating: the possibility of stopping reacting from the past and starting to live from the present.

The Flyght Method: Learning to Be Well from Within

At Flyght Wellness Club , we believe that wellness is a learned process . It's not a permanent state or a goal achieved one day and maintained through inertia. It's a process of self-knowledge and daily practice, in which we learn to look at our history with greater clarity and less judgment.

Through the Flyght Method , we support women who, like you, feel they accomplish a lot but live little. Women who seek calm, clarity, and real energy. Our tools—guided reflections, introspection exercises, meditations, and journaling—help you explore how your relationship with your parents has shaped your way of loving, caring, and living.

It's not therapy, nor is it accelerated coaching. It's a space for conscious pause where you can learn, step by step, to let go of what weighs you down and retain what nourishes you.

An exercise to start today

Today we invite you to pause for a few minutes. Take a piece of paper and write down the answers to these questions:

• What did I learn from my parents about love and self-worth?

• What attitudes of theirs do I recognize in myself today, and want to transform?

• If I could look at my parents with compassion, what would I understand about their own wounds?

This small exercise, part of our introspection practices at Flyght, is a first step toward your healing. Because healing the past begins with observing it without fear.

Looking back to move forward

Healing our relationship with our parents isn't just an act of family reconciliation; it's an act of self- love . It's recognizing that, although we don't choose how our story begins, we can choose how it continues.

When we stop seeking the approval we lacked within, when we accept our parents as they are, without idealizing or punishing them, we free ourselves. And in doing so, we open ourselves to a more authentic, lighter, and more peaceful life.

🌿 At Flyght, we believe that every wellness journey begins with a decision: learning to be well. And that learning begins when you dare to look within, with tenderness, and choose to heal.